I can't make heads or tails of my life !!

Last week was kind of a bad week for me..precisely every week is. My so called close friend messaged me saying that her birthday party will be on the 27th. Whatever! The silly thing is she was too excited and trying to get me into the excitement. Nonsense ! Can she see what I'm going through. People are selfish, they use you when they need you and this is an example here. Why should i share her happiness? None of my business. When i needed her, she wasn't even there. I broke up with my ex and was badly hurt by that, and she didn't even care. Suddenly out of nowhere she messaged me to inform that her birthday bash is coming. She kept talking about the decoration, what Saree she wants to wear, what shoes to buy. OMG !! Annoying ! I don't even care a bit. I won't be going to the party for sure. Another person who makes me sick is my sister. I don't know how to say how hurt and angry i am that these people who live with me don't even care about my feelings. I also spilled out my deepest secret because i was too angry and hurt. I regret letting the cat out of the bag. Only me ex knows about it. At times, when you're sad, you just wanna go out and feel good about yourself but whenever i ask my sis out, she would have all her excuses ready. I was too sick of her excuses and begun to argue. She hates my ex. When i was with my bf, she told him to break up with me. Can you imagine, your own sis telling the only one you love that? It was like being stabbed with a knife. It was shocking! People think our relationship was not serious and it was only puppy love. Bullshit! They will never know how much we loved each other and had gone through so much together. Straight from my heart, i really hate my sis..better not to have one. She's selfish and heartless. If you hate whom i love, i don't give a damn, it's my feelings that matter in my relationship. Not yours people, just get a life!! My sis thinks her bf is so smart, so good..yeah right..she doesn't know guys because this is only her first love ever. When i broke up with me ex, i kept it inside..don't blame me. Who should i talk to? My sis? My friends? HA HA. They even liked me breaking up with him. They are happy for me for that reason. I swear to God, i don't bless her relationship, don't give a damn about her so called good bf, don't give a damn about her. She does nothing for me, selfish !! I remember i used to help her a lot getting through her relationship. She even came crying to me...i did everything i could. But when it comes to me, she ignores my feelings completely. She was angry that i told my ex bf about our personal problem. Yeah, besides him, who can i talk to? He was the closest person to me, still is..he's my best friend. He understands how i feel, he cares and he's always there for me. No one else. First time i met a person whom i can trust and tell everything i want to him. And I'm glad i found him because i would be talking to myself and the wall. I hate whenever people talk bad about the person i love, just can't stand it...i will always defend him. You don't know him, i know him. I was surprised myself that he actually has a heart of gold. I know he was like this bad kind of guy but he's totally changed. You know why? Because i was the one who changed him, i was with him for 2 years, i know how he was. No matter how much i got hurt by him, i never hate him, never! And in my life, the happiest times were when i was with him. Now, no one makes me happy, my life is so dull. I laugh and smile less. And i got no interest in life. I hate everything, my close friends, my sis-everything!! Now i must know which side my bread is buttered on. I can't think about people anymore, i must be selfish and i just don't care whatever outcomes i will get. I have to break the mould for my own good.